Cock in a cunt lyrics

Well I’ve had it off 3 or 4 times
But I’ve woke up with a semi and a bird by my side
My nob is yelling ‘I’m going in’
But my brain is telling me I just can’t win
So I start some sturdies and I have to try
To ejaculate but my sac’s run dry
So I think of things that are rude and that
Will make my penis spit its fat

My cock in a cunt, my cock in a cunt
My cock in a cunt but it won’t go off
I’m having a shunt, I’m having a shunt
I’m having a shunt with a lady’s muff

We’v been shagging now for over half an hour
Surely soon I’ll get a seminal shower
I’ve started now so I can’t just stop
I want my old boy to pop his top
I’m tired, I’m knackered and my dick’s red raw
My ballbags ache and my stem is sore
My sturdies have become so fast
If I slip out now my cock will snap in half

My cock in a cunt, my cock in a cunt
My cock in a cunt but it won’t go off
I’m having a shunt, I’m having a shunt
I’m having a shunt with a lady’s chuff

Hold on a minute I’ve gotta get my breath back

My cock in a cunt, my cock in a cunt
My cock in a cunt but it won’t go off
I’m having a shunt, I’m having a shunt
I’m having a shunt with a lady’s muff

Some of the crowd are on the pitch
They think I’ve done my beans but there’s been a hitch
We’ll have to save that one for later
My nob looks like it’s been whacked off with a cheese grater