You're a paedophile lyrics

Mr. Meehan your computer
Has been analysed
We found a folder on your desktop
Which was not well disguised
It was named ‘little front bottoms’
So when we looked inside
The pictures that we found
Didn’t leave us that surprised

Those were not my pictures,
I’ve not seen them before
Sure I’ve downloaded adult porn
Even scat but nothing more
You’re coming down the station
Because you’ve broke the law
With your nudey pics of little kids
Levels 1-4

You’re a paedophile
You’re a paedophile
You had pictures of kids, that’s what you did
So you’re a paedophile
I can tell by your style
I think I’ve known for a while
You don’t mind cocks or vaginas
As long as they’re minors
Cos you’re a paedophile
You don’t mind cocks or vaginas
As long as they’re minors
Cos you’re a paedophile

Perhaps it happened by accident
I clicked an erroneous link
And mistakenly downloaded jpegs
Of minors showing pink
Come off it Mr. Meehan
That’s a crock of crap
You don’t accidentally acquire pics of kiddies
Sat on a nude man’s lap

Someone else must have used
My computer without me knowing
And downloaded pics of little kids
With their privates showing
Come off it, Mr. Meehan
That’s not true at all
I know you bid on the Mini-Pops
DVD if you recall

You’re a paedophile
You’re a paedophile
You had pictures of kids, that’s what you did
So you’re a paedophile
I can tell by your style
I think I’ve known for a while
You don’t mind cocks or vaginas
As long as they’re minors
Cos you’re a paedophile
You don’t mind cocks or vaginas
As long as they’re minors
Cos you’re a paedophile

Craig, I can’t believe the things
They found on your PC
I’m a woman with ladies’ private parts
What is wrong with me?
I guess you deserve the truth, love,
But don’t you get upset
To be honest it’s your big ginger gash
That drove me onto the net

I haven’t interfered with kids
Or abused your trust
I’m not their special uncle
I haven’t got a perverted lust
I came across the pics online
And so I saved a few
I’m not a nonce, I just were bored
And it were something to do

I’m not a paedophile
I’m not a paedophile
I had some pictures of kids, that’s all I did
I’m not a paedophile
You can tell by my smile
It will be proved in a trial
Though a court case is looming
I haven’t been grooming
I’m not a paedophile
I’m not perverted
I never inserted
So I’m not a paedophile