Upsetting squares and making ladies moist 2003 - 2016
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Simon Cowell (Hashtag #dirtyprotest)

Every year the X Factor, an annual talent hunt
Throws up another bollocks ballad by some cardboard cut out cunt
It irks me to such an extent, when I feel this shirty
The only protest that will fit, is one involving human shit

Simon Cowell
I’d like to empty my bowel
Then pick it up with a trowel
And sling it at Simon Cowell
But Simon Cowell
I don’t wanna be under arrest
So I’ll do a poo and tweet it to you
With the hashtag #dirtyprotest

On the fifteenth of December
I’m asking you to remember
To protest Simon’s bland releases
By making your anus do faeces
Snap what comes out of your bowel
And tweet it to @simoncowell
And with the excrement you’ve messed
Attach the hashtag #dirtyprotest

Simon Cowell
I’d like to empty my bowel
Then pick it up with a trowel
And sling it at Simon Cowell
But Simon Cowell
I don’t wanna be under arrest
So I’ll do a poo and tweet it to you
With the hashtag #dirtyprotest

Simon Cowell
I’d like to empty my bowel
On a used sanitary towel
And sling it at Simon Cowell
But Simon Cowell
I don’t wanna be under arrest
So I’ll do a poo and tweet it to you
With the hashtag #dirtyprotest

Simon, this is for you
Simon, this is for you
Simon, this is for you
Lots of pictures of people’s poo

Simon, this is for you
Simon, this is for you
Simon, this is for you
I photographed my number two
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