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I Shit My Pants

I'm feeling very poorly, poorly in my belly
But I promised to attend a fancy dress party
Before I don my outfit I go and have a big shit
Which is very runny and very, very smelly
 
LK: You can tell by his smell that he's not very well

So I get to the party still smelling slightly farty
I'm wearing a white clown suit and trying to clench my poo chute
I say some quick hellos to one or two fellows
Then I dash to the bog but the fucking door is locked
I'm trying to retain control of my poorly anus hole
I run back down the stairs but see someone I know there
I get stuck in conversation but my mind's on defecation
The stomach pains are sharp, maybe I can get away with just one parp

 
LK: You can tell by his smell that he's not very well
      You can tell by his smell that he's not very well

What could I do? I did a poo
I farted and I followed through
I made a mess on my fancy dress
I was a clown but now my pants are brown


What could I do? I did a poo
I farted and I followed through
I made a mess on my fancy dress
I was a clown but now my pants are brown

And I can't move though I know I oughtta
My cacks are full of rusty water
And warm gravy is dripping from my bum
I've shit my pants in front of everyone
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