Upsetting squares and making ladies moist 2003 - 2016
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Wipe To Beige

Essuyer a beige, essuyer a beige

You’re at home waiting for a parcel
You need a crap, not sure if there’s time
As a turd’s coming out your arsehole
Sod’s law, you hear the doorbell chime

You’ll have to go and get it from the depot

Unless you
Ah ah
Wipe to beige
Ah ah
Wipe to beige


You’ve took a bird to a fancy restaurant
Suddenly you really need a poo
You don’t want to spend too long in the toilet
Your date will know you’re doing a number two

Unless you
Ah ah
Wipe to beige
Ah ah
Wipe to beige


You’re down the pub and you’re watching football
You do a shit and need to wipe your hole
You hear a cheer and it makes you panic
You’re gonna miss the replay of the goal

Unless you
Ah ah
Wipe to beige
Ah ah
Wipe to beige


Ah ah
Wipe to beige

You can always finish it off later

Ah ah
Wipe to beige

It might have dried up by then anyway

Ah ah
Wipe to beige

Best not do it if you’ve got white underwear on

Ah ah
Wipe to beige

If someone you really hate offers to give you a rimming

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Little Kunt
Kuntrarian
Lyrics reproduced courtesy of
Little Kunt.

The views of Little Kunt do not in any way represent Kunt and the Gang.